Monday, August 11, 2014

One year,


Today it is exactly one year since that day, what changed so much for me in my life. I can't say that it was an good change, but change what showed me later who are wrong people in my life.
Exactly a year ago, I was on my way home from Jönköping, when I lost the control over my car and drove into another cars trailer. In one way very lucky accident and another way very unlucky accident. An lucky accident because if the car from opposite side of road had drove slower, I would had contact exactly with drivers door and I might have damaged him, so that i hit trailer, it made that accident an lucky one. On the other side that accident was very unlucky for me, since I did not manage to get out of it with no damages. In that accident had inevitable damages for me. I damaged my shoulder and unfortunately very seriously. No luck on my side that day. A year after, I still have problems with the shoulder and still taking every day strong painkillers. Most sad is, that there seems to be some people, who does not believe that pains are there, since damage is inside and not outside. Had I lost arm or leg or broke something visible, when perhaps some skeptics would had believed.
This accident was also the beginning of so many changes in my life. It changed my working abilities, it changed first people in my life. It showed, who is shallow persons and who are real.
Today, a year later since the beginning of changes, it has been time to learn, time to feel and most definitely time  to be patient. Lessons for how to be more patient have been most hardest, since I am not the patient person. To be patient and to give the time - two things or more likely words, what I just do not to want to hear anymore. Have a wait a half a year the shoulder operation, since first they wanted to see that I would get some movement to shoulder back and how much pain it will do, when it was planned into June and later I got to know that I have to wait until the vacation times is over. Will see how long time I have to wait. At least this is not the experience and feelings I would like even my enemies to feel, or perhaps some. Might be that after that, they would understand that all this is not a joke, that this is true and feelings and pains are true.
It was just how and where I had my thoughts today. Thoughts, feelings, imaginations, and still I am back in point there I have to be patient and just give the time. One year since I had to say goodbye to my blue purse and get to used to with the new black one. Life and it's adjustments. I am just happy that I am alive and the accident was an lucky unlucky one. Beginning of my own adjustments what I was need really perhaps. Or maybe not, we never get to know.
Sleep well,
                  Love,
                              Ingrit