Friday, December 30, 2016

Good Bye 2016!


Today is next last day of this year. 2016 i close to be end and 2017 arrive. Time goes fast. It felt like yesterday, that we had 1th of January 2016. During this year, it has been happened so much in my life. Both positive and negative things. As life usually is, with it's ups and downs.


Year started for me as unemployed. Since my car accident, it has been for me a big change for my life. I have fought with pains. I have had several operations and nothing has helped. As well as another unsuccessful operation. Ok, there I am very happy, that I am still alive today.  Due of that, I have found several good friends, as well lost some. Not many people can understand how it is, to live with serious pains every day and still smile and just be there. For me, to keep my mask has became so daily achievement, that to be without it, would be strange and different. Still, there is a days, when I have taken mask off, since I can't manage to keep it on every single day. Those days just are worst, when I can't keep it on, since I afraid, that I hurt the person I love the most. Still I am very happy, that he is still by my side and supporting me. He still loves me and so far, would like to spend his life with me. That is something I am still very thankful. He is beside me and supporting me and loving me. But to come back about, to be unemployed, when, on Monday, when week started, I had no job, and Friday evening on the same week, I had 2 jobs. Jobs, what I both love and like and what has it's own challenges in it's own way. Another thing, what I am thankful for 2016.


Beginning of this year, also one of our dream came true, but in the same time it crushed some months later. We succeeded with help, to get pregnant and expect our small miracle. Unfortunately some months later, I got miscarriage. It was hit me very hard, since that miracle was very much expected and loved, even thought we had not seen him/her yet. It took me very hard in so many ways. Thanks for the support from my friends and family in Estonia, I managed to get somehow through it. We tried again couple of times and failed again. One of the sad part of 2016. Same time it seems, that my body did not like all this treatment and now, we have stopped that idea. One more dream crushed, but nothing to do. Still, I have loving husband by my side.Also several small babies and children around me to play with and spend time with their parents. Still, it is not totally the same, but as they say - better something than nothing. I love to spend time with my cousins children's as well with my friends children. Soon there will become one small baby girl more into this world, whom I can spoil as well.


I am also very thankful for Lions. Members of Lions Club in Jönköping believed in me and chose me as their president for 3 years. It has been very thoughtful, teaching, interesting and very much giving time for me. I have met a lot of interesting and good people during this year and more adventures is on it's way. Me and Tommy together with another member from Lions Club Jönköping had very nice and interesting trip to Minden and together from there to Cologne. I had honor to meet a lot of lovely people. I learned a lot during that trip and saw a lot. I also have seen how kind different members in Lions can be. Not only members in my own club have believed in me. Also members in our district have believed in me. In the beginning of September I was chosen as 2nd Vice District Governor in MD101SV. I feel it is a honor, a lot of responsibility,  lot of good times, meeting new people and so much more.


Why Lions. Yes, here I can write a very long list. Lions means for me, so many things. For me, the members in Lions Club Jönköping, has been part of my integration into the society. I have learned to speak that language as much as I do, I have been introduced to how some of the things works in this country. Another reason, why Lions - together with other members in this international organization, we can make a difference. There is a need, there is always a Lions and helping. In local, in national and in international level. The money what comes in to the club, all that goes out to the ones, who has bigger need, than we. We help people to get education, to get better health, to have place to sleep, to get clean water. All this, what we sometimes taking for granted, since it is easy to get it here. In our local club we help women shelter - so that mothers and children can get a positive memory during the hard times, Riding school for disable people in different ages. In national level we helping through to buy tents, so that in disaster Lions through Swedish Civil Contingencies Agency to the countries, there the need is to get people to have place to be and sleep and some kind of the roof over head. A project what is very important to so many. In international our district having a Sewing school in Odari, Nepal. To help women to get some education, so that they can't be sold by their families as whores or that they does not end up in trafficking. So, Lions makes a difference in the society in so many ways and that's why it feels a natural for me, just to be part of it and help with. So, my road in Lions will continue. I am happy and thankful for that. It teaches me more, it opens more my eyes and I will be part to help people by making a small difference. One person can't do much, but if we are together, we can make a great deal. We have just some weeks ago one nice Swedish tradition, what helps to raise funds, so that we could help our local women crisis centre. As I mentioned earlier, it is so important for me, that those children. Who lives in those protected properties together with their mothers, that they will get something nice to remember, when they get oilers. That is something there I feel, that we in Lions can make a difference. Just thought of, how happy the kids are in their summer collo week or their day trip, have made me to work hard on that project. That is something I self missed in my childhood during some of my memories from that time. Some of the memories still hunting me, even though that I am not a child anymore. So that those kids can have something positive to remember, is very important for me and together with nice group of Jönköping Lucia girls, the children can have that opportunity. For my small tiny heart, it feels so good. Just a small smile from those kids, makes my heart to melt.


This year, has also thought another way, how important is time, we have with each other. With our families, with people we love. It was not enough, that I have had obstacles and issues to fight with. My husband, who always has said, that he is never sick, never happened something and so on and on. He can't say that anymore. I hope just, that he stops to scare me once in a while with happenings. Still that is another moment, I can say, that I am thankful for my friends and family and for their support. It is not easy to live alone in the country, and all the rest of my family lives another country. Still, they have been here for me. Love my aunt and her family, who has been here for me, when I have needed them. I hope that 2017 will have a solution for my husband and he will be feel much more better again and will be himself, but it is as a wake-up clock. Remains us, that we do not know, what tomorrow will have with it. It might bring a happiness or it might have tears for us. We don't know never how much time we have for each other. Christmas is usually the time, we remember beloved ones who has left this world, but also, if there happens something with our beloved ones, that feeling about time, gets more and more clear and we think how much time we can have together. For us, I hope, that doctors can fix the problems and that medications will help and we can have lots of time together. So that you and me can experience how it will be get old together. We have stil so much to find out and to see. Love you with all my heart, even thought that sometimes, I just want to give up all and move back to home.


2016 have also had with it several interesting trips. Around in Sweden as well as abroad. It has been a while, since we have traveled that much. I have enjoyed my trips together with my husband as well alone. It has been giving to us both the time we need to have together as well our own time. Only one trip, what I made alone, I am bit sad, that my husband could not follow with me, but at least we could fly home together from Stockholm. Loved that feeling, that one comes from one trip and another from another place and we meet in airport to take a last part of the trip together and to come home together. Just to get that hug and kiss, was worth it. I also had visit from my family this year. It was good to show them even around here and celebrate Easter together. They also saved my Christmas and I had Estonian food on our Christmas table. Nomm Nomm Nomm. Only it has been a while, since I have celebrated Christmas with my family. Something to put into my plan again.


So, as the conclusion, 2016 has been a year with full of challenges. It has been a year with lot's of laugh, a year with a lot of tears and sorrow, it has been a year, what I would really love to forget and in the same time I am very thankful for this year, since I have supporting husband, loving family and supporting and great friends, who just has been here for me. 2016 has been a year, what one way I am hate and one way I love. Mixed feelings will take me to the end of 2016 and my only wish for me is, that 2017 will be bit more nicer for me and that couple of my wishes and dreams will come true.


I would wish to all of you: Happy New Year!! May 2017 be more nicer to you, bring a lot of good times not less sorrow. May it bring moments of laugh and less tears. My wish to you is: Just enjoy the year and surround yourself with people, who is caring of you and loving you. My wish to you is, take a best of everyday and remember that. It has been something, what has helped me to survive this year. My wish to myself will be exactly the same, to find a positive moment from every day and help to create some more positive moments for myself, since I feel like that is something, what will help me in the end, to get through the year. I am very, very thankful for each and everyone, who is surrounding me in so many different ways. Some as lessons for life, some as moments to share, some just being there in hard times with good word, company or just a small hug.

Happy New Year to everyone!!
                                                  Love,
                                                           Ingrit